Life n its Lessons

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The Human Defense Mechanism or in Other words the guard we keep up around us is a pretty interesting facet of human nature.

It generally tends to shape itself from experiences we have had in our life’s and a matter of personal choice. Hard to imagine but every individual seems to have a different one.

Give it a thought Experience + Personal Choice

Bad Breakup - Bad Experience, One decides to never love again
Bad Breakup - Bad Experience, One Decides to move on and give it another shot
Bad Breakup - Bad Experience, One Decides to Move on and not make the same mistakes again
Bad Breakup - Bad Experience, One Decides to take relationships as a joke and just stick to flings

The Permutations and Combination’s are limitless. However this is actually influencing many other aspects of ones life don’t you think ?

Defenses Going up and Coming up all around us everyday but only to the individuals who they relate to know about it.

Does This Mechanism influence your state of mind ?
Does it drive away something good which maybe entering your lives ?
Does it Protect One from Hurting themselves again ?
Does it Help you to stay happy ?

Well the answer i found was : Yes to all of them

Now i started pondering with the question how do i have the best of both worlds cause from what you see the mechanism although helps protect you could also be driving the good things of life away from one.

Ah the perfectionist me at work again (Many People i know hate this aspect of me)

I pondered with this situation for years before it struck me…

One can’t really let down their defenses that would be stupid. But Only if applied a few more measures besides his or her defenses

a) Start anything in life with a clean slate (Relations, Work, Anything) with no relation to such events in your past.
b) Gave it time. Like one would give a plant water in expectation for it to bloom as a tree one day
c) Your Intuition followed by a keen eye.
d) Positive attitude to try if you fail once in this experiment.

Well i gave it a shot, And Guess what well i Failed

Put some thought into why i failed. Well my Intuition was wrong. i tired changing some one with the above. Realized after many years the above would only allow one to accept or reject some one thru their defenses. Not change someones nature. There is a Chinese saying i read once.. its easier to change the shape of a mountain or course of a river then to change some ones character…

Still Pondering to Improve this theory . Give it a thought give it a shot should work for a select few who understand it. i am almost getting it to work

Peace
Timeber Da Wolf