Life n its Lessons

I always wondered why i like keeping a low profile out of the limelight … no matter how much i pondered over it .. i never seemed to reach a conclusion…  till i was driving to bandra a fine evening back in time…some moron decided to switch on his high beam and fog lights ..  as i drove past him the lights blinded me for a moment.. i slowed down and parked the car at a corner .. rubbed my eyes till i could see well again ..

The thought of being blinded freaked me out for a moment .. i am not the kind who likes walking into the abyss every now and then…. an occasional stroll works just fine for my sense of adventure..

As i reached my destination at reclamation i pulled the car to the usual spot and waited for a friend to arrive …. The sky was cloudy but it had a strange yellow hue to it with the rays of the setting sun.. the wind blew gently and the waters calm … its the kind of thing that makes you realize the goodness of life …

i sat there on the bonnet of my car pondering with my thoughts .. thinking about the events i have been a part of over the past few days … and the conversations .. some sane but mostly insane .. Till a thought flew by me …When one gets too much attention from another .. or when too much glamour is showered upon one … it tends to blind you .. very similar to the event that occurred with me on the way to bandra … its only human nature to take things for granted .. its a good thing to always stop and re evaluate the world around you .. you never know who you might just be walking over ..

Peace
Timber Da Wolf

You will never know someone …. Unless someone decides you should know them
its the profound truth whether we like it or not ..

Its Human Nature to fear oneself naked from the preying eyes of the world.

Sometimes our doings are best left untold as repercussions would not only hurt you as a individual but many around you as well ..  i don’t agree with the above .. but i do respect it ….

A few have trusted me to see what they hide .. Many have shown me what they would like me to see… and then there are a few who i would like to know but would never know anything about …

After all you are what you hide …

Peace
Timber Da Wolf

The past couple of weeks have been interesting in some ways… i could see a bunch of my intuitions come true What those intuitions were is a different story all together …

A few months back i had put down a few thoughts on the human defense mechanism… Since then not much has changed i still see people putting up new walls around them and taking down some if not all old walls .. i do that too a times but try and make sure it need not apply to people who may be close to me or people i am just getting to know ..

Why ? well the answer is simple

The chances of two people sharing the same tastes in all aspects of life are slim to none.. i am sure everyone agrees to this … its not a perfect world

Similarly every individuals action, reaction , words , thoughts in a particular situation or towards a person may also vary …

One lays down walls based on their experiences in life … perfectly normal human nature …

But keeping in mind the uniqueness of every individual doesn’t it make it a little unfair to make all people climb walls that were created by no contribution of their own …

Does that make one Selfish ? or Plain Foolish ? i do not know

But i do know alot of good things fade away till they actually get across these walls .. Life always is a path made up of an individuals choices …

Peace
Timber Da Wolf

A few days back while having a conversation with a friend.

Its something i have followed over the years and in most cases it helps me read individuals … You can never know the whole truth.. but one can get an idea of whats coming your way ..

I am not sure how many believe in positive and negative vibes… Its as obvious as a bad or good oder if one chooses to keep his or her senses on high alert.. It can be a tiering affair to keep ones senses active all the time… But then if you want to get to know someone … It takes an effort…

An Individual expresses in many ways .. The Most obvious ones are Words (Speech) and Actions

But then there are also passive expressions … Body Language, Eyes and Facial Expressions

Having the gift of gab is a great asset for most.. but then no one is perfect. Sometimes a pair of keen eyes gets the better of the words… Sometimes the Words get the better of Glittering Eyes.. Sometimes the Glittering Eyes Get the better of a heart in love …

A Rule of the thumb.. Which generally portrays an arrogant and snobbish image of myself. I take a few months sometimes maybe even a year before i form an opinion about anyone… Getting to know someone takes considerable amount of effort sometimes.. i may never form an opinion too at times.. Why ?

Well some mysteries are best left unsolved and some questions are best let unanswered, in other words… reward is not worth the effort …

When you observe someone during multiple encounters… Their Words may flow .. but maybe the eyes or the body language would give in … Words May Point up north but actions may point down south …

A Classic Situation “The worlds most commonly spoken lie “i love you”… North South Theory Ring a bell ?

The more you talk to an individual and the more you don’t pull them up at points when he or she is pulling a fast one on you.. The more they let their guard down … Making the task of getting to know them a walk in the park..

Sure its stupid to let people pull a fast one on you … So long as it doesn’t hurt or kill you. It only saves you valuable time and energy …

Its Human nature to take people for granted … Sometimes being dumb .. is being smart

Peace
Timber Da Wolf

Every once in a while i seem to get into a conversation with someone or the other regarding someone screwing them over .. in their personal or professional lives… And often i hear this ” Once trust is broken.. it can never be repaired” Well in most cases of professional arrangements i would agree to it….

Personal … Well not always the case

If you look all around you.. You find people .. People who are different in their own unique way. No two people you know would be 100 % alike. May agree or gel with you, But yet they maintain their individuality..

Individuality so complex and diverse ..i don’t know a single person who has it all figured out till date.

Complications of individual personalities is something which i do not wish to explore at the moment its a rather complex subject to discuss with a never ending search to a conclusion..

Human Race ever since it inhabited this earth…. thru countless generations have taken tiny steps towards discovery of everything that stands around us today… and will keep taking those steps till the end of our time

Proving the the obvious fact… Man is a thinking animal …well at least some of us still are

People make mistakes.. Thats how they learn.. Thats how they discover themselves…and everything around them
Thats how they come to terms with their personality and life

And if the obvious fact of “Man being a thinking animal” is true .. Then people who make mistakes learn from their mistakes to make smarter choices in life ahead..

Life as the years pass by has a funny way to teaching people … thru direct or indirect situations or thru reactions to actions and words of an individual… Some learn.. Some never stop chasing their own tail…and well some just never realize to learn.

Personal Experience 8 out of 10 people who one may give a second chance to will screw you over at some point or the other…. So the odds are high.

But yet there is a faint chance… Someone may learn from their mistakes .. Would you give them a chance ?

I know i would .. a word of caution if you have the patience and the heart for second chances ..

Hope … Don’t have Expectations

Peace
Timber Da Wolf

After 26 yrs of my life …and Number of serious and casual relations i came to a realization which never struck me before.. An individuals Character is the safest long term bet you can have on them …

I was heading back home from work and a old college buddy gave me a buzz .. Did’nt have anything better to do so figured i would catch up with him.

Sitting at a bar he was blowing his horns about casually dating a married woman at work.. I was not surprised but to bust his chops i just asked him…

Me : Hey How old are you now ?
Him : 25 Yrs
Me: Cool so i am sure you would be married in a few years .. have anything on your cards ?
Him : Maybe in a few years
Me : Hey you know there maybe a remote possibility a few years down the line when your married. You could have 2 Single guys sitting in this bar and discussing your wife … lol
Him : STOP Don’t you dare say another word on that … i’ll find myself a decent girl
Me : Ah
Me : So looks like it maybe arranged
Him : I guess it could be …
Me : Hmmm…
Me: So a thought just occurred to me so your saying the current married chic you are dating is not a decent chic hence you are going out with her to have a good time .. But you would only marry a decent chic ?
Him : Correct
Me: Being the smart ass i am ” Hey so is there a remote possibility that the decent chic you decide to marry suddenly has the realization that she has not explored life and decides to change her approach post you guys get married”

He Looked at me stunned.. With No answer

Me: So either ways you are screwd

Anyways we ended that conversation … i lit up a smoke .. as i took the first puff …
It hit me maybe character of an individual is the safest long term bet

There is a Chinese saying ” Its easier to change the course of a river or the shape of a mountain .. Then to change and Individuals Character… ”

Individuals Change with time and keep changing till the end of their time … There is no known constant from birth to death ..

Food for thought ?

Peace
Timber Da Wolf

I have been a little lazy not been penning down my wandering thoughts … Its the first week of October and i am re visiting a thought i had in August..

Ever try and solve a Jig Saw Puzzle ? Put it together piece by piece to come up with a picture… Don’t you think life is such too ?

People often start putting themselves and their life’s together in their mid teens a piece at a time some take longer then the others .. some start quick think they have it all figured out but then get stuck at some point. i don’t know if most of you would agree with me…i think there is no end to this. People just keep putting things together till the end of their time.

Think about it the first relationship you ever had which ended and it seemed like the end of the world. But then you put another piece to the puzzle and moved ahead which in return down the line lead to another.

Think about the job you were frustrated with and quit. Followed Your heart and put another piece together of your life.

A Jig Saw Puzzle isn’t it ? Put one Piece together and another falls into place

Except this puzzle doesn’t have a definite picture you are putting together or an end result you would get to see. Its Abstract art that every individual puts together as life passes by.

i am still trying to discover the art i have been painting for the past 26 yrs

Peace
TimberDaWolf

The Human Defense Mechanism or in Other words the guard we keep up around us is a pretty interesting facet of human nature.

It generally tends to shape itself from experiences we have had in our life’s and a matter of personal choice. Hard to imagine but every individual seems to have a different one.

Give it a thought Experience + Personal Choice

Bad Breakup - Bad Experience, One decides to never love again
Bad Breakup - Bad Experience, One Decides to move on and give it another shot
Bad Breakup - Bad Experience, One Decides to Move on and not make the same mistakes again
Bad Breakup - Bad Experience, One Decides to take relationships as a joke and just stick to flings

The Permutations and Combination’s are limitless. However this is actually influencing many other aspects of ones life don’t you think ?

Defenses Going up and Coming up all around us everyday but only to the individuals who they relate to know about it.

Does This Mechanism influence your state of mind ?
Does it drive away something good which maybe entering your lives ?
Does it Protect One from Hurting themselves again ?
Does it Help you to stay happy ?

Well the answer i found was : Yes to all of them

Now i started pondering with the question how do i have the best of both worlds cause from what you see the mechanism although helps protect you could also be driving the good things of life away from one.

Ah the perfectionist me at work again (Many People i know hate this aspect of me)

I pondered with this situation for years before it struck me…

One can’t really let down their defenses that would be stupid. But Only if applied a few more measures besides his or her defenses

a) Start anything in life with a clean slate (Relations, Work, Anything) with no relation to such events in your past.
b) Gave it time. Like one would give a plant water in expectation for it to bloom as a tree one day
c) Your Intuition followed by a keen eye.
d) Positive attitude to try if you fail once in this experiment.

Well i gave it a shot, And Guess what well i Failed

Put some thought into why i failed. Well my Intuition was wrong. i tired changing some one with the above. Realized after many years the above would only allow one to accept or reject some one thru their defenses. Not change someones nature. There is a Chinese saying i read once.. its easier to change the shape of a mountain or course of a river then to change some ones character…

Still Pondering to Improve this theory . Give it a thought give it a shot should work for a select few who understand it. i am almost getting it to work

Peace
Timeber Da Wolf